Cat Glossary

Cat Bag


the art of hiding under the bed behind the bed skirt, clawing at unsuspecting passing feet.


because man is clearly not the animal best-suited to the art of management.


an elephant-sized personality packed into a miniature feline.


the reason that cats need eight extra lives.


you think the cat is scratching the door because she wants to go outside, until she scratches the other side of the door, in which case you think she has changed her mind and now wants to come back inside; but what she really wants is to lie down right smack in the middle of the doorway, which obviously is the best side of the door to be on (or, rather, in).


this is your kitten’s brain on catnip.


no news is too dangerous for a cat to abandon its present occupation, scramble through the feet of beasts twenty times its size, and be first on the scene.


the way to find a kitten is to walk into each room of the house, say her name, and listen carefully for the tell-tale purr.


getting stuck in, and rescued from, the same tree three consecutive days.


fools who think they are becoming cat owners.

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